Hard to do, but unlike yous twos, no alternate lists or honorable mentions, I stick by my choices, when it suits me.
1. Quest for the Holy Grail
2. South Park Bigger Longer Uncut
3. Caddyshack
4. Princess bride
5. The Great Outdoors
6. See no evil, hear no evil
7. Trading Places
8. Spies like us
9. Tommy Boy
10. Happy Gilmore
Friday, June 26, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Picking the peck of Pickles- Comedies
#1 - Raising Arizona
#2 - Dumb and Dumber - A place where beer flows like wine and the women flock like the salmon of the Capistrano. I'm talking about Assspen!
#3 - Caddyshack
#4 - Monty Python - I know what I said, and the witch would have shot me off the bridge by now..... Big pointy fangs
#5 - The Jerk
#6 - Princess Bride
#7 - Superbad
#8 - Waynes World - Its excellent, its party time.
#9 - PCU - the first copy of Animal house that brought it more current and kept it funnier than Old School.... watch both then argue with me.
#10 - Office Space
Honorable Mentions - was hard on me keeping these babies out:
Zoolander, Naked Gun, Ghostbusters, Blues Brothers, Animal House, Big Lebowski (this is THE movie, not the funniest, not the dramaticitist.... its the one).
#2 - Dumb and Dumber - A place where beer flows like wine and the women flock like the salmon of the Capistrano. I'm talking about Assspen!
#3 - Caddyshack
#4 - Monty Python - I know what I said, and the witch would have shot me off the bridge by now..... Big pointy fangs
#5 - The Jerk
#6 - Princess Bride
#7 - Superbad
#8 - Waynes World - Its excellent, its party time.
#9 - PCU - the first copy of Animal house that brought it more current and kept it funnier than Old School.... watch both then argue with me.
#10 - Office Space
Honorable Mentions - was hard on me keeping these babies out:
Zoolander, Naked Gun, Ghostbusters, Blues Brothers, Animal House, Big Lebowski (this is THE movie, not the funniest, not the dramaticitist.... its the one).
Peerality's Top 10 Funniest Movies of All Time - What'r Yours?
Amidst the rash of acclaimed comedies like “The Hangover” and “Role Models,” I thought I’d run down a list of my favorite comedies of all-time. I want to share my list with my fellow mules, see what you think and take a look at your lists as well. Ten is an exclusive list, so I had to cut out gems that I put in my honorable mention category. Take a look, discuss and let me know what your top 10 is. I basically asked myself, “Self, if you could only watch 10 more comedies in your life, which ones would you have to see?” Maybe we could come to a consensus and have a Pickled Mules Top 10 list – HiFi syle, a little old-school Johnny C. Pickelman knows that Peerality has a thing for Johnny C. Look at him. Look into his eyes . . . .
1. Dumb and Dumber
2. The Big Lebowski
3. The Wedding Crashers
4. Anchorman
5. Old School
6. Ferris Bueller's Day Off
7. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
8. Animal House
9. 40 Year Old Virgin
10. Caddyshack
Honorable mention: Airplane, Van Wilder, Ghostbusters, Super Bad, Office Space, Planes Trains and Automobiles, Uncle Buck, Knocked up, Superbad, Role Models, The Hangover
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Peearlity Broncos Blitz'd: Predictions, Prognostications and Prostate Exams
In the last installment of Peerality Broncos Blitz'd, I stated that predictions and a certain literary pinache would follow in my next entries. So, it seems that it is now time for the yearly Peerality prognostications. Last year I said Peyton Hillis was a steal, that Spencer Larsen would be good and pointed to Wesley “Mr. Atomic” Woodyard as my favorite free agent pick-up. I also predicted that Cutler would make the probowl and become an elite QB. I was correct on those fronts. I was, however, incorrect when I predicted that Dwayne Robertson would help shore up our weak d-line and that Tim Crowder and Jarvis Moss would step-up for us. So, my predictions this year will probably be a mixed bag - but, here goes.
Projected Starting Line-ups:
FS -Hill
SS - Dawkins
CB - Goodman, Bailey
OLB - Ayers, Crowder
SS - Dawkins
CB - Goodman, Bailey
OLB - Ayers, Crowder
ILB - Davis, Williams
DE: McBean, Peterson
DE: McBean, Peterson
NT, Fields
LT - Clady
RT - Harris
LG - Hamilton
RG - Kuper
C - Casey w.
TE - Graham
RB - Moreno
FB - Hillis
WR - Royal
WR - Marshall or Gaffney if B.Marsh goes Awol
QB - Kyle style
All up in dat' ass wit' da resurrection: Past Busts Become Present Musts
This year, young bronco busts of old will be looked to to compete and contribute like never before. Let's hope that, like Sair from Office Space, they prove to truly be all up in dat' ass wit' da' resurrection. First, let's look at guys I think will improve and contribute. From what I hear, Jack "Mofo" Williams has been great so far and will get a long look at CB. Look for him to push Andre Goodman for time opposite Champ. Also, be on the lookout for Tim Crowder. He has taken reps with the first team base D in OTAs and, if he plays like this when the pads are on, he should be set to start on opening day at OLB.
Now, let's look at guys I'm not so sure about. Ryan McBean and Kenny Peterson, who hardly played under Shanny, will likely start for McD in the base 3-4. I don't think they will stack-up and I think younger guys like Rookie FA Chris Baker could be taking reps from these two by mid-season. Marcus Thomas could also fit into this mix and could end up being good in the 3-4. I think he will end up starting in place of either McBean or Peterson, probably Peterson. Another guy to watch for is Nic Clemons - an '08 pick who did well early then got hurt last season. Along w/ Thomas, look for Clemons to push for a starting position in camp. Finally, Jarvis Moss. Jarvis, freaking Moss. The bane of Mike Shanahan's career, the biggest disappointment since George Foster and . . . Jay Cutler? I still can't believe we drafted this dude in the 1st round (Moss). This training camp will be the last shot for Jarvis Moss. Let's hope he doesn't suck (although he probably will).
Prediction: Tim Crowder will be a stud for us this year. Moss will be cut by opening day. One of them will pan out and contribute this year, prbably Crowder. If both do, I would be shocked and elated. Peterson and McBean will not start on opening day. Even if they do, I don't think they will both be starting by the end of the season. Clemons and or Marcus Thomas will take their jobs.
A Key to our season: Sophomore Studs, Junior Jockstraps and a Rookie Riot:
As I have stated previously, the key to this team’s success will be the progression of it’s young core. From the remainder of the ’06 class of Sheffler, Marshall, Kuper and Dumervil to the ’07 remnants of Crowder, Moss, Harris and Marcus Thomas to the epic ’08 classmates of Woodyard, Larsen, Clady, Hillis and Eddie “Money” Royal wit’ cheeses of pepperjack and swiss and even Ryan "Training Room" Torrain. The development of these players will be the key (along with Kyle style). If these guys progress as past seasons have indicated they can, and guys like Crowder and Mofo Williams step-up, we’ll be a salty little squad.
I predict they will step-up. I think Tim Crowder will emerge. I think Harris, Clady, Kuper, Sheffler, Hillis and Royal will all continue playing at a high level and will improve. I also think that Larsen and Woodyard will have breakout seasons – Woodyard is already emerging as a leader and Larsen is just a bad man who will likely see time in all three phases. These guys are all high-character football players with good work ethics and I predict they will continue to get better. They will help keep us competitive even if we lose a lot of games b/c of the D-line and Kyle style.
The rookies are the wild card. They could take this team from being a salty little squad to being a contender – they could also choke on their chickens and drag us into obscurity. One thing’s for sure – with nearly 25 of them (almost 1/3 of the roster) going to camp, a number of them are going to see the field this year.
I predict they will step-up. I think Tim Crowder will emerge. I think Harris, Clady, Kuper, Sheffler, Hillis and Royal will all continue playing at a high level and will improve. I also think that Larsen and Woodyard will have breakout seasons – Woodyard is already emerging as a leader and Larsen is just a bad man who will likely see time in all three phases. These guys are all high-character football players with good work ethics and I predict they will continue to get better. They will help keep us competitive even if we lose a lot of games b/c of the D-line and Kyle style.
The rookies are the wild card. They could take this team from being a salty little squad to being a contender – they could also choke on their chickens and drag us into obscurity. One thing’s for sure – with nearly 25 of them (almost 1/3 of the roster) going to camp, a number of them are going to see the field this year.
Prediction: If Knowshon is offensive Rookie of the Year, we will lose no more than 9 games. If Robert Ayers is defensive rookie of the year, we will not have a losing record. If both of those things happens, we'll have a winning record and a legitimate shot at the playoffs - not necessarily b/c of their impact but b/c this would indicate that Kyle had a good year and that our D-line did it's job in the 3-4 (keeping O-lineman off our linebackers). If both of those things happen and Alphonso Smith, McBath and R.Quinn turn into instastuds, we could contend and McD will be coach of the year - given that he's made a lot of controversial moves and put his nuts out there with conviction, "Hi everybody, I'm Josh. Here are my nuts. Take a long hard look. Yeah, that's it. You've been a naughty little league haven't you?" Finally, if Dick Quinn seals the edge and is a man-child on the field, look for him to be somewhat of a folk hero b/c of his humble attitude and brute strength - a la Lenny from Of Mice and Men - in fact, that's his new nickname, Lenny.
THE Key to our season: Kyle style and the D-line
With the departure of Jay Cutler and the institution of the 3-4 scheme, our season will largely rest on our D-line and the shoulders of Cutler's replacement, Kyle Orton. We all know that Kyle is Smart and has won in this league. We're also all nonplussed about losing the most exciting and talented QB in the game. We all know that, in the 3-4, the D-line is key and that if we don't control the line of scrimage it doesn't matter how good our secondary is b/c the QB will have all day to pick them apart - not to mention the fact that they can just run on you all day.
Prediction: This is tough. Orton has been solid in the past but he is no Jay Cutler. If I had to guess, I'd say we'll run the ball a lot and he'll be somewhere in the middle - 22 TDs, 9 Ints on the high-side, 16 TDs 14 INTs on the low side. The D-line, as it is presently constituted, will not be any good IMO. I hope I'm wrong. I hope Kyle goes for 28-5. I hope Ron Fields turns into a beast at NT and that McBean mcdestroys everyone - I just don't see it happening. The emergence of Orton as a stud is more likely than our defense going all-pro on us. If Orton is a legitimate stud, we'll win at least 7 games. If he is a stud and the d-line is at least above average, we'll win at least 9 games. If Orton is a stud and the D-line is good, we'll win 10 or more games - but don't hold your breath, boys. Orton will probalby be better than expected (like 19/10) and the D-line will be about as mediocre as expected and we'll probalby win between 5 and 8 games.
Things to Watch for in Camp
-The Progression of the rookies: Will Knowshon start on opening day? Will Ayers dominate physically when the pads go on? Will McBath be all over the field? Will Alphonso Smith claim his spot at nickel corner over Jack Mofo Williams?
-Getting defensive: Will Woodyard and Larsen step-up? Is Andra Davis too slow / will Larsen take his spot? How will our D-line stack up to our all-world O-line? How much does B.Dawk have left in the tank? How quickly will the guys grasp the new system? How healthy are Champ and DJ?
-Kyle-style: How well will Orton operate in the offense with live bullets coming at him? How well will he gel with his receivers? Will he keep the job through camp?
-Position battles of Interest: The most interesting position battles are at OLB (ayers, moss, crowder, dumervil, Reid), CB (Mofo, Goodman, Smith, Josh Bell and a bunch of FA rookies), and RB (Buckhalter, Moreno, Jordan, Hillis and Torrain).
-How will McD utilize Sheffler and Hillis?
-Free Agent Rookies to watch: Chris Baker (DE/NT), Everette Pedescleaux (DE), Britton Colquitt (P - little brother of Dustin from KC), Nate Swift WR, and last but not least, the Iraq war veteran Rulon Davis (OLB/DE). He could be a feel good story in the MSM if he plays. He's got good size at 6'5" 281 and from what I've heard a great work ethic and he was a manchild in college at Cal.
-Interesting sidenote - Cutler for Orton will be a perfect study in the philosophy of quarterbacks: system v. stud. Cutler goes to a crappy system to resurect it with his talent while Orton brings average talent to the most coveted of the current systems. Cutler has limited weapons while Orton has many . . . it will be interesting. Personally, I wish it was Stud in System (Cutler still here) but . . . whatevs. It is what it is.
Summary and Final Predictions
I choose to be sunny, but realistic. The keys are QB, DL and the development of our young players. I like what we've done in the secondary and at LB. I also like our RB corp and feel we have the best offensive line in the game.
That said, we have major question marks at QB and along the defensive front - which is the key in a 3-4 scheme. Also, who's our #1 receiver next year if B.Marsh is traded or if he's hurt worse than he's letting on (which is what I suspect as an orthapedic surgeon told my old man that his surgery takes at least a year to heal from - would also explain why he's staying away from the trainers as trust is a weak excuse).
I will pencil Orton down for a slight improvement TD/INT on what he did last year with the Bears - from 18/12 to 21/11 with around 3,400 yards and a 59% completion percentage. I will also assume that our key Defensive players remain healthy and that Champ returns to his old form. I will assume that our running game will be very good and that Knowshon will be a stud at between 1200 - 1800 all-purpose yards. As we are now emphasizing special teams, I will assume that we will be better there as well. Overall, we have a chance to be a solid football team.
Unfortunately, our schedule is brutal, we play Philly, Dallas, Baltimore, NE, Indy, Pitt, Washington, and The G-men. Ouch!!!! I will assume that we will sweep the Raiders and split with the chiefs and chargers - going 4-2 in conference. Cincy on the road and Cleveland at home will be sneaky-tough. Caution says we'll split these, but I think our new schemes will take these teams by surprise and allow us to take both early season games - 6-2. We would do exceedingly well to go .500 for the remainder of this schedule and be at 10-6. On the low-side we could lose them all and go 6-10.
-Absolute Worst: 5-11 (losing to all tough teams and slipping up against the raiders, bengals or browns.
-Absolute Best (realistically): 11-5 (6-2 as I predicted and then somehow go 5-3 v. the rest of that schedule) 10-6 is more realistic, but I'm setting 11-5 as the realistic ceiling
-Kool-aid: 13-3 baby! Orton is a stud, Ayers and Moreno go nuts and our D-line is solid. The secondary is the best in the league and we avoid the injury bug. We catch everyone by surprise w/ our schemes and JMcD is now JMcGenius and the mile high city's a' rockin' while Cutler rots and cries in Chitown.
My Prediction: 10-6. This is optimistic, but I think we can go 4-2 in the division, beat cincy and cleveland and go .500 v. the rest of the schedule. My gut says 7-9 but I chose to ignore it. Go Broncos!!!!!
Thanks for reading, boys. Until next time, keep your reality on the fritz and your Peerality on the blitz.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
UPDATE: Wiegmann gets new contract; Boss out
From the Denverpost.com:
"Veteran center Casey Wiegmann agreed on Wednesday to a new two-year contract.
"Wiegmann, 35, had been scheduled to make only the veteran minimum salary of $845,000 this season, and was considering retirement if he and the team could not work out a new contract more befitting a player who has started 127 consecutive games and made the Pro Bowl last season. "
No details on the dollar amount, but no other player on our team was as entitled to another contract than Mr. Wiegmann. He came from the Chiefs, meaning he wasn't entitled to anything last year. But he upped his play and was absolutely phenomenal stepping in last year and manhandling Defensive fronts right along with Ryan and Ryan. This, in the Pickleman's opinion, is the first absolutely brilliant move made by McDaniels crew and is the only move this off season that won't create a division among Broncos fans - because lets face it, as awesome as Dawkins was, there are a lot of them saying hes too old to have been brought in and why the hell are we paying Andra Davis so much money?
full article here: http://www.denverpost.com/broncos/ci_12608207
"Veteran center Casey Wiegmann agreed on Wednesday to a new two-year contract.
"Wiegmann, 35, had been scheduled to make only the veteran minimum salary of $845,000 this season, and was considering retirement if he and the team could not work out a new contract more befitting a player who has started 127 consecutive games and made the Pro Bowl last season. "
No details on the dollar amount, but no other player on our team was as entitled to another contract than Mr. Wiegmann. He came from the Chiefs, meaning he wasn't entitled to anything last year. But he upped his play and was absolutely phenomenal stepping in last year and manhandling Defensive fronts right along with Ryan and Ryan. This, in the Pickleman's opinion, is the first absolutely brilliant move made by McDaniels crew and is the only move this off season that won't create a division among Broncos fans - because lets face it, as awesome as Dawkins was, there are a lot of them saying hes too old to have been brought in and why the hell are we paying Andra Davis so much money?
full article here: http://www.denverpost.com/broncos/ci_12608207
In other news - Boss Bailey let go - SHOCKER!!!!!!! Also, Louis Greene released. Greene, we hardly knew you, but you played hard.
First it was goodbye, then it was err...good...bye...errr...riddance, now its ehhh whatever
FIRST IT WAS GOODBYE
THE FIRST PART IN A THREE PART RAMBLE
Aproximately 6 months ago my jaw dropped off my face. Mike Shanahan was fired. I had been on and off the Shanny train for the past few years, but I was actually firmly on it seeing what he had done with the draft and seeing the direction I believed he was taking our team. I didn't exactly like Bates and I didn't exactly like Slowick, but I liked the personnell moves of the past two Shanny Seasons.
Also, I rememberd an interview done with Shanahan where he said that he would put the Broncos back into the AFC West Championship game in 5 years and have a solidly built team that would hold up for years to come. He was three years into that team when he got canned.
In my view, in that three year time, Shanny had slowly began transforming our O into something much more vicious and stable than the down hill blocking for an RB and roll out passes that it was in the past. He was allowing the QB to finally have a pocket to work in. He brought in Clady, Cutler, Royal, Stokely, Scheffler, Brandon Marshall, Harris, Torrain, and Hillis. It was clear he was building a solid young O and the foundation had been laid and the house was being built. The offensive yards of last season can show you that.... the scoring though shows that his O-house didn't yet have a roof. Well, give it time and a healthy season for RBs.
On the reverse side of the ball, Shanny had constantly been tossing in scrubs on D. Since losing Trevor Price on purpose, and other than drafting Darrent Williams (rest in peace) I believe Shanahan has failed miserably on building the D. But that was clear at the end of last year and there was some potential in off-season and draft moves to begin our two year rebuild on that side of the ball...
It was my opinion that Shanny needed one more year at least to see if he could begin improving the D. The D that appeared to me to be the absolute worst in the league. He had rebuilt a young talented team on one side and the other side just needed an injection of new players and maybe some tackling lessons to make it head and shoulders better than it was in 08.
Well.... no more time Shanny. Bowlen - who has admitted to losing his short term memory - decided he had enough of you being in charge and failing to get this team back into Super Bowl contention. I guess the 2005 season fell just inside his short term memory gap, because any time you are in an AFC Championship game you are practically to the promised land. But, I guess Bowlen started to read and listen to Jake Plummer's negative views on Shanny's coaching. I guess he read Fatsis book and agreed with some of those negative views....
Bottom line Shanahan chose his allies that might have ended up getting him fired. He chose to stand by Slowick, when Bowlen asked him to let him go. He chose to promote Cutler when Plummer had taken him to the door of the promised land the year before (a move I approved - because my opinion matters). He chose to listen to the three headed cyrubus that was the Goodmans and Xanders then to place his opinion on top of that. He chose to not listen to the owners requests for direction. He was slowly rebuilding the Broncos, but slow was not fast enough.
Goodbye Mike Shanahan. Thanks for your time. Thanks for your service. Thanks for the memories. Don't get lost in your house.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Toms and Tigers
Many people may not know this but Kansas is a wonderful beautiful State, well some of it. In eastern KS you can find some of the prettiest rolling hills and small forested areas great for white-tail and my friend the turkey. Tuttle Creek Reservoir close to Manhattan, KS has some great spring turkey hunting where you are sure to see many toms out strutting. Two non-resident tags are only $120, and they have some nice toms in the area that are worth every penny plus the enjoyment of being able be out hunting. It’s a drive from Boulder, but nothing too bad that you can’t get done in a morning. It can be hard to find a good spot to go out there, but many ranchers if you ask nicely will let you on their land. I was lucky enough to have an open invite to a massive cattle ranch, and had all the acreage to my hunting party. There were 3 of us and we came back with 5 birds, 4 toms and 1 bearded hen. I can’t wait to get back out there and get some more.
Yet that isn’t all that can go on in this area. There are a lot of nice golf courses around Kansas as well. The one that robbed me of all the balls I had purchased a couple days before playing was Colbert Hills. On the trip to play Colbert, I tried to go turkey hunting as well but wasn’t able to get any in Russell, KS mostly due to weather (I hate tornados and hail, Jody hates the hail more though). So after not getting any and putting all the hunting gear away and pulling out the clubs, I got to see some massive toms strutting on the golf course. I wished my golf game was better so that I was able to take a few out with a ‘killer tee shot, how brutal would that have been? Colbert Hills is just a beautiful course with the large rolling hills, so many nice trees, and very green. It is also a very hard course and I went through 25 balls on the front nine. Now at the time of playing I hadn’t played for many years and had a much worse game then present, but still it is a challenging course. I did fall in love with their GPS screens in the cart. I wish every course had these, it was a huge help on distances and knowing where the hole is. On some courses I play for the first time, I end up going for the wrong green, due to crappy little drawings and just not being able to see the correct green.
So if you like playing like Tiger Woods and enjoy killing some toms, you have to get out to Manhattan, KS for some fun, come spring time.
The many halves of golf
The many halves of golf
Half of golf is putting
Half of golf is hitting straight
Half of golf is distance
Half of golf is skill
Half of golf is practice
Half of golf is driving
Half of golf is irons
Half of golf is woods
Half of golf is staying on the fairway
Half of golf is not going in the water
Half of golf is clothing
Half of golf is style
Half of golf is physical
Half of golf is mental
Half of golf is weather
Half of golf is gambling
Half of golf is not cheating
Half of golf is breaking your club heads off
Half of golf is girls in short shorts and small skirts
Half of golf is money
Half of golf is friendships
Half of golf is drinking
Half of golf is me (aka the new Tiger)
All of golf should be fun.
GOLF and Life - Review #1 - Canceled - Riverdale Dunes
Apologies to those who requested a review on Riverdale Dunes for this entry, but I didn't have the heart to even finish that course, let alone pay enough attention to write a review. One of the great things about golf - it gives you insight to life if you're careful to observe all the changes playing out around you and the reactions of yourself and fellow golfers. A simple booking mistake turned our foursome into a threesome with a pairing with a stranger. Frustration at the mistake took over for the Szar as he was the fourth and they turned him away at the pro-shop. Confusion flowed over me, because I knew there was a simple way to solve this problem, but I couldn't figure out what it was.
Three of us volunteered to walk away from the incorrectly booked spot allowing the remainder to play. The problem was the volunteer who made the most sense to be excluded also happened to be my wife, who is not familiar with the surrounding Denver area. I also knew how excited she was to play golf that day. She walked, I stayed. The Szar, who had also volunteered to stay in the club house and get pickled instead of playing, played and fumed the entire front nine.
As I wound my way through a slow course-congested 18 (see side note below), my thoughts faded more and more away from my swing and my score and more and more to what kind of a man and a husband I am.
Although the booking mistake was innocent, I ultimately suffered in my score and in all fairness, I have to believe that I took a small notch out of my relationship with my wife. For some reason I couldn't see past playing golf that morning, but by the 8th hole (when my birdies, pars, and bogeys turned into double pars) it was clear that I should not have been on the course. My head and my heart were not in it, because I had screwed up, not the person who made the tee time. I'm not the person to turn someone away so that I may enjoy exclusively my time with my friends... and in this instance I turned away the person I pledged my whole life to, the person who changed her name to Picklewoman for me.
Next time there is a tee time screw up, I hope that I can be a big enough man to walk away from my friends to ultimately do whats right. This time I didn't and feel that I have learned something about myself.
Side Note - Slight review - Riverdale Dunes has a lot of native grass that will devour your balls. Also watch out for snakes on the fairway. Expect a 5 1/2 hour round if you play on a weekend and the starters aren't doing their jobs. There are a lot of slightly blind shots, where a knoll or shall we say a dune, obstructs your view from the flag stick. Its not an incredibly long course. Accuracy on this course is more important that distance, so don't be afraid to drop the driver and go even as low as a 5 iron off the tee. You'll be able to reach it in two on most of the par 4s if you're knocking it out 180 to 200 with your tee shot.
Three of us volunteered to walk away from the incorrectly booked spot allowing the remainder to play. The problem was the volunteer who made the most sense to be excluded also happened to be my wife, who is not familiar with the surrounding Denver area. I also knew how excited she was to play golf that day. She walked, I stayed. The Szar, who had also volunteered to stay in the club house and get pickled instead of playing, played and fumed the entire front nine.
As I wound my way through a slow course-congested 18 (see side note below), my thoughts faded more and more away from my swing and my score and more and more to what kind of a man and a husband I am.
Although the booking mistake was innocent, I ultimately suffered in my score and in all fairness, I have to believe that I took a small notch out of my relationship with my wife. For some reason I couldn't see past playing golf that morning, but by the 8th hole (when my birdies, pars, and bogeys turned into double pars) it was clear that I should not have been on the course. My head and my heart were not in it, because I had screwed up, not the person who made the tee time. I'm not the person to turn someone away so that I may enjoy exclusively my time with my friends... and in this instance I turned away the person I pledged my whole life to, the person who changed her name to Picklewoman for me.
Next time there is a tee time screw up, I hope that I can be a big enough man to walk away from my friends to ultimately do whats right. This time I didn't and feel that I have learned something about myself.
Side Note - Slight review - Riverdale Dunes has a lot of native grass that will devour your balls. Also watch out for snakes on the fairway. Expect a 5 1/2 hour round if you play on a weekend and the starters aren't doing their jobs. There are a lot of slightly blind shots, where a knoll or shall we say a dune, obstructs your view from the flag stick. Its not an incredibly long course. Accuracy on this course is more important that distance, so don't be afraid to drop the driver and go even as low as a 5 iron off the tee. You'll be able to reach it in two on most of the par 4s if you're knocking it out 180 to 200 with your tee shot.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Who is the WORST Head Coach in the NFL
I do not agree with this article, but it ranks coaches from top to bottom... let's just say if the Pat's had some man love going on last year, Belichick was not the bottom:
From: SPORTINGNEWS.COM
Coaches rankings: Give it up for Bill Belichick
June 4, 2009
The top coaches are the grizzled vets who have proven their worth over time. But there are some young coaches who are pushing their way to the top and finding new ways to do things. The coaching tide is beginning to turn in the NFL.
RealScouts, Sporting News' team of former NFL scouts, rank all the head coaches:
1. Bill Belichick, Patriots. The smartest coach in the NFL. No one does a better job of adapting schemes and personnel to the opponent on a week-to-week basis. He always finds a way to win the matchup game.
2. Tom Coughlin, Giants. Preparation is the key for the detail-oriented Coughlin. His team is ready to play every Sunday.
3. Andy Reid, Eagles. No matter what is going on in and around his team, Reid has the Eagles contending at the end of the season.
4. Jeff Fisher, Titans. In the NFL, no one gets to stay in one place as long as he has unless you are really, really good. A yard away from a Super Bowl title, he guided this team through a restructuring phase and back into contention.
5. Mike Tomlin, Steelers. Tomlin is smart and tough, but the best thing he does is delegate authority. He lets his coaches coach, and his players play.
6. Sean Payton, Saints. Payton is an offensive genius leading the juggernaut that is the Saints offense. With more talent on defense, he could have a contender on his hands once again.
7. Ken Whisenhunt, Cardinals. The desert has been a burial ground for good coaches, but Whisenhunt has conquered all the negatives and put the Pittsburgh stamp on the former laughingstock of the league.
8. Mike Smith, Falcons. He's a defensive-minded guy who took a rookie quarterback and a no-name defense and turned them into a contender in his first year as a head coach.
9. John Fox, Panthers. Fox is a player's coach and a great motivator. The players love playing for him in Carolina.
10. John Harbaugh, Ravens. Unlike most coaches, he has no ego, but is still very effective in front of the team. He gets the most out of every player and coach on the roster.
11. Brad Childress, Vikings. The team has gotten better every year under his watch in Minnesota, and last season he got the Vikings to the playoffs without a strong quarterback.
12. Tony Sparano, Dolphins. Like his boss, Bill Parcells, Sparano brings an attitude and toughness to the team that had been missing for several years. He's a block and tackle guy who boils everything down to fundamentals.
13. Norv Turner, Chargers. An outstanding offensive play caller, Turner has had enough presence and savvy to right the ship in troubled times and keep the Chargers in contention for a championship.
14. Mike Singletary, 49ers. He's a hard-nosed, tough-minded, old-school guy who will eventually have a team built in his image if given time.
15. Wade Phillips, Cowboys. Phillips takes too much blame for what goes on in Dallas. But in addition to being an innovative defensive mind, he has the ability to deal with some very big egos.
16. Mike McCarthy, Packers. He has the necessary belief in his team to make bold changes and make them pay off. Last year, he dumped Brett Favre for Aaron Rodgers. This season, he moves his defense to a 3-4. He's always looking for ways to make the team better.
17. Jack Del Rio, Jaguars. His team is built in his image; tough, physical, and competitive. Last year was a tough one in Jacksonville, but Del Rio proved himself as a true leader by making the tough offseason decisions.
18. Dick Jauron, Bills He's a true player's coach who has been around the league a long time. Though he came through the ranks as an excellent defensive coordinator, his most prominent trait is that his players love to play for him.
19. Jim Mora Jr., Seahawks. Mora has been groomed for this Seattle job over the past year, so he has learned the ropes of the organization. He's a smart man who will learn from his mistakes made in his last stint as the head guy, in Atlanta.
20. Lovie Smith, Bears. A true Tony Dungy disciple, he is the picture of stoicism on the sideline. He's one of the first generation Tampa Two guys on defense, and his group will be much better this season now that he's reunited with line coach Rod Marinelli. His new quarterback, Jay Cutler, will make him and his team better as well.
21. Marvin Lewis, Bengals. It wasn't long ago that Lewis was considered the pre-eminent defensive mind in the league. He's a very good coach, but it's hard to be successful in Bengal Land, despite his best efforts.
22. Gary Kubiak, Texans. The Texans have one of the top two receivers in the game, a solid quarterback, an exciting young running back, an improved offensive line and productive young talent on defense. It's time for Houston to make the jump to the postseason, and that spark has to come from Kubiak.
23. Jim Zorn, Redskins. Following Joe Gibbs is not an easy job in D.C., and the owner situation is a tough one. Things started well enough for Zorn in '08. He's a good coach, but we would have expected he'd handle his players better. He needs to show he can bounce back from a poor finish.
24. Rex Ryan, Jets. We will bet money Ryan will be higher on this list next year. He's got all the tools to be a great coach, and now he's finally getting his shot.
25. Eric Mangini, Browns. In the mold of his mentor, Mangini is tough. But he is stubborn and stuck in his ways, which often limits his game plans and hurts his relationships with his players.
26. Steve Spagnuolo, Rams. Spags is as creative as they come when it comes to using personnel groupings and alignments to create mismatches on the field. He's also got outstanding leadership characteristics. What he needs now is some more talent.
27. Jim Schwartz, Lions. He's an excellent football coach who has an excellent rapport with his players. But right now, Detroit is a tough place to prove how good you are.
28. Jim Caldwell, Colts. Peyton Manning is the coach, captain and leader of this team. As long as the quarterback is in Indy, Caldwell will not drive the success of this team.
29. Todd Haley, Chiefs. Haley is a tough, hard-nosed coach who comes into his first head coaching gig with high expectations of himself and his team. He's also an excellent play caller, but the Chiefs are severely lacking in talent. However, if he can weather the storm early on, his front office should take care that problem over time.
30. Tom Cable, Raiders. Cable showed some fight at the end of last season, and proved he can get his players to play for him. But despite all the good feelings now, the owner makes this a tough situation for any coach.
31. Raheem Morris, Buccaneers. The players in Tampa like him a lot. But he's a young coach,
with no head coaching experience, and he may very well be in over his head.
32. Josh McDaniels, Broncos. No head coach, especially a rookie, makes his mark by trading away the franchise quarterback. McDaniels is already off on the wrong foot.
From: SPORTINGNEWS.COM
Coaches rankings: Give it up for Bill Belichick
June 4, 2009
The top coaches are the grizzled vets who have proven their worth over time. But there are some young coaches who are pushing their way to the top and finding new ways to do things. The coaching tide is beginning to turn in the NFL.
RealScouts, Sporting News' team of former NFL scouts, rank all the head coaches:
1. Bill Belichick, Patriots. The smartest coach in the NFL. No one does a better job of adapting schemes and personnel to the opponent on a week-to-week basis. He always finds a way to win the matchup game.
2. Tom Coughlin, Giants. Preparation is the key for the detail-oriented Coughlin. His team is ready to play every Sunday.
3. Andy Reid, Eagles. No matter what is going on in and around his team, Reid has the Eagles contending at the end of the season.
4. Jeff Fisher, Titans. In the NFL, no one gets to stay in one place as long as he has unless you are really, really good. A yard away from a Super Bowl title, he guided this team through a restructuring phase and back into contention.
5. Mike Tomlin, Steelers. Tomlin is smart and tough, but the best thing he does is delegate authority. He lets his coaches coach, and his players play.
6. Sean Payton, Saints. Payton is an offensive genius leading the juggernaut that is the Saints offense. With more talent on defense, he could have a contender on his hands once again.
7. Ken Whisenhunt, Cardinals. The desert has been a burial ground for good coaches, but Whisenhunt has conquered all the negatives and put the Pittsburgh stamp on the former laughingstock of the league.
8. Mike Smith, Falcons. He's a defensive-minded guy who took a rookie quarterback and a no-name defense and turned them into a contender in his first year as a head coach.
9. John Fox, Panthers. Fox is a player's coach and a great motivator. The players love playing for him in Carolina.
10. John Harbaugh, Ravens. Unlike most coaches, he has no ego, but is still very effective in front of the team. He gets the most out of every player and coach on the roster.
11. Brad Childress, Vikings. The team has gotten better every year under his watch in Minnesota, and last season he got the Vikings to the playoffs without a strong quarterback.
12. Tony Sparano, Dolphins. Like his boss, Bill Parcells, Sparano brings an attitude and toughness to the team that had been missing for several years. He's a block and tackle guy who boils everything down to fundamentals.
13. Norv Turner, Chargers. An outstanding offensive play caller, Turner has had enough presence and savvy to right the ship in troubled times and keep the Chargers in contention for a championship.
14. Mike Singletary, 49ers. He's a hard-nosed, tough-minded, old-school guy who will eventually have a team built in his image if given time.
15. Wade Phillips, Cowboys. Phillips takes too much blame for what goes on in Dallas. But in addition to being an innovative defensive mind, he has the ability to deal with some very big egos.
16. Mike McCarthy, Packers. He has the necessary belief in his team to make bold changes and make them pay off. Last year, he dumped Brett Favre for Aaron Rodgers. This season, he moves his defense to a 3-4. He's always looking for ways to make the team better.
17. Jack Del Rio, Jaguars. His team is built in his image; tough, physical, and competitive. Last year was a tough one in Jacksonville, but Del Rio proved himself as a true leader by making the tough offseason decisions.
18. Dick Jauron, Bills He's a true player's coach who has been around the league a long time. Though he came through the ranks as an excellent defensive coordinator, his most prominent trait is that his players love to play for him.
19. Jim Mora Jr., Seahawks. Mora has been groomed for this Seattle job over the past year, so he has learned the ropes of the organization. He's a smart man who will learn from his mistakes made in his last stint as the head guy, in Atlanta.
20. Lovie Smith, Bears. A true Tony Dungy disciple, he is the picture of stoicism on the sideline. He's one of the first generation Tampa Two guys on defense, and his group will be much better this season now that he's reunited with line coach Rod Marinelli. His new quarterback, Jay Cutler, will make him and his team better as well.
21. Marvin Lewis, Bengals. It wasn't long ago that Lewis was considered the pre-eminent defensive mind in the league. He's a very good coach, but it's hard to be successful in Bengal Land, despite his best efforts.
22. Gary Kubiak, Texans. The Texans have one of the top two receivers in the game, a solid quarterback, an exciting young running back, an improved offensive line and productive young talent on defense. It's time for Houston to make the jump to the postseason, and that spark has to come from Kubiak.
23. Jim Zorn, Redskins. Following Joe Gibbs is not an easy job in D.C., and the owner situation is a tough one. Things started well enough for Zorn in '08. He's a good coach, but we would have expected he'd handle his players better. He needs to show he can bounce back from a poor finish.
24. Rex Ryan, Jets. We will bet money Ryan will be higher on this list next year. He's got all the tools to be a great coach, and now he's finally getting his shot.
25. Eric Mangini, Browns. In the mold of his mentor, Mangini is tough. But he is stubborn and stuck in his ways, which often limits his game plans and hurts his relationships with his players.
26. Steve Spagnuolo, Rams. Spags is as creative as they come when it comes to using personnel groupings and alignments to create mismatches on the field. He's also got outstanding leadership characteristics. What he needs now is some more talent.
27. Jim Schwartz, Lions. He's an excellent football coach who has an excellent rapport with his players. But right now, Detroit is a tough place to prove how good you are.
28. Jim Caldwell, Colts. Peyton Manning is the coach, captain and leader of this team. As long as the quarterback is in Indy, Caldwell will not drive the success of this team.
29. Todd Haley, Chiefs. Haley is a tough, hard-nosed coach who comes into his first head coaching gig with high expectations of himself and his team. He's also an excellent play caller, but the Chiefs are severely lacking in talent. However, if he can weather the storm early on, his front office should take care that problem over time.
30. Tom Cable, Raiders. Cable showed some fight at the end of last season, and proved he can get his players to play for him. But despite all the good feelings now, the owner makes this a tough situation for any coach.
31. Raheem Morris, Buccaneers. The players in Tampa like him a lot. But he's a young coach,
with no head coaching experience, and he may very well be in over his head.
32. Josh McDaniels, Broncos. No head coach, especially a rookie, makes his mark by trading away the franchise quarterback. McDaniels is already off on the wrong foot.
RealScouts analyze NFL and college players, coaches and teams exclusively for Sporting News.
Pfffffffffffff..... whatever... Up until now, there had only been 4 coaches better than McD - Mike Shannahan (the man who brought us two), John Elway (the Man who actually coached the O), Dan Reeves (the man who fought the man who coached the O, but brought a lot of glory to the Donks), and Red Miller (his name is awesome, it would have only been awesomer if it were Orange and Blue Miller or Red John Elway Miller). McD is going to be famous.
Season 1 Schedule in a Slo-Fo Preview
I will take like 5 minutes every friday to type some gibberish regarding the Broncos upcoming schedule. Essentially I will review the teams they will play. It will be called Slo-Fo because I will just do a team every Friday until the Season starts, so its slow (Slo) and its foward (Fo) looking. I hope I don't have to keep explaining myself to you fools.
Week -4 (or 4 B.R. - Before Real-games-start)
The Denver Broncos travel to San Fransisco to take on the lowley 49ers.... It will be interesting to see how the Simms, the Knowshon, the Orton, the Ayers, and the Smith do as some of our new key components to this team. Other than that... who cares, its the 9ers and preseason... Lets drink some pickle juice!
Yep, thats it. Stay tuned next Friday for the fabulous analysis of when the Broncos travel to rainy Seattle.
Week -4 (or 4 B.R. - Before Real-games-start)
The Denver Broncos travel to San Fransisco to take on the lowley 49ers.... It will be interesting to see how the Simms, the Knowshon, the Orton, the Ayers, and the Smith do as some of our new key components to this team. Other than that... who cares, its the 9ers and preseason... Lets drink some pickle juice!
Yep, thats it. Stay tuned next Friday for the fabulous analysis of when the Broncos travel to rainy Seattle.
Our Defense's Present and Future - Two Reasons to be excited about our "D"efense
The Present
People say that Brian Dawkins is a presence and that he brings leadership, intensity and passion. Those are nice words, but I think this video drives the point home - plus it'll get you juiced for the season. This kind of animal is what we have longed for on defense. Yes, he is in the twilight of his career, but watching him last year proved to me that he still has a couple years left in the tank. When he was introduced, B.Dawk said he was flattered when McD approached him - telling him that we NEED him. To this end, I agree with McD. We need more of this type of presence on our defense. We now have a young secondary w/ draft choices etc. Let's hope some of this rubs off on them in the next couple of years.
The Future
Robert Ayers. The last time I heard Mike Mayock rave about someone like this, it was in regard to a certain QB from Vandy in '06. This is. of course, ironic given that we used a Cutler-trade pick to snag Ayers at 18. Mayock says Ayers will be the best defensive player from this draft. I hope so as I harbor little doubt that Cutler will develop into the best offensive player in the league. When watching Ayers in this video, as he dominates top competition at the senior bowl and in the SEC, it's hard to argue with Mayock's assesment.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Peearlity Broncos Blitz'd: . . I mean Blitz . . . er what was that occifer?
Greetings. I am Peerality and this is the first installment of the Peerality Broncos Blitz'd. It has been a long and tumultuous offseason for our Denver Broncos and I know that many of us have been dizzied by the many moves of the young and inexperienced McDx (McDaniels and Xanders). So, before going into any analysis, I will lay out our offseason - in a nutshell. We drafted 10 players, picked up 15 in free agency, cut or didn't re-sign 29 players and, of course, traded away our probowl quarterback. Here is a "brief" look at what we've done:
A. 2009 Draft:
1st round: 12. Knowshon Moreno, RB, Georgia 5'10" 217 - Best player available, as B.J Raji and T.Jackson (our needs) were gone. This is a good pick-up and you don't draft a RB in the 1st unless he has HOF-type talent. Knowshon is tough, smart, blocks and catches the ball well and is a leader. He's also hilarious and I recomend you check out his Upper Deck and Topps endzone dances. He will truly be a blast for years to come - personality for miles (the horse).
1st round: 18. Robert Ayers, DE, Tennessee 6'3" 272 - High risk. Judging by the senior bowl / Mike Mayock, in Ayers, we drafted the best defensive player in the draft – a steal at 18. If you ask guys like McSheezy, he was a one year wonder at Tennessee (no real production until his senior year) with a checkered past. I like the pick. Look for him to get a look at starting OLB and DE if he puts on some weight. We’ll also look to reduce him inside / play a 5 / 6 technique. He will have his hand on the ground at times and play upright sometimes.
2nd round: 37. Alphonso Smith, CB, Wake Forest 5'9" 195 - Wow. Ok. I love this guy. He set an ACC record w/ 21 interceptions at Wake and is a tough-minded ball-hawk who will see the field immediately as a starting CB or in nickel packages. He is also a stud in the return game. That said, we gave up our #1 pick next year, which could be THE #1 pick or at least a top-five. McD and X said they had him valued “extremely high” and that he was the #1 corner on our board. Whether he was worth it will depend on who was right – the pundits or our front office. If he flourishes / turns into an all-pro, we’ll know McD/Xman are better evaluators than McShay / Kiper.
2nd round: 48. Darcel McBath, FS, Texas Tech 6' 198 - Looks like a solid safety who will play some, contribute hugely to special teams and will likely be a starter w/in a year or two. Also a ball-hawk w/ high character, good speed and good fundamentals.
2nd round: 64. Richard Quinn, TE, North Carolina 6'4" 265 - Another high-character guy. Seems like a Daniel Graham type guy. Great blocker who was underused at North Carolina in the passing game. This move signals a change and shows that we intend do RUN THE BALL - at least more than McD used to, which I like. Again, though, we traded up for him (traded our 2 3rd rounders for a 4th and a 2nd - using the final 2nd on Quinn) so he’d better be truly special.
4th round: 114. David Bruton, FS, Notre Dame 6'2" 219 - Special teams Ace. Could challenge for a starting spot at safety in a year or 2. He was team captain at ND in college - a leader and ANOTHER high-character guy.
4th round: 132. Seth Olsen, G, Iowa 6'5" 306 - Going into the draft I hoped we'd use several picks to fortify our O-line and we did. I love this guy. He is a mauller, big, strong and cornfed. Look for him to start w/in a year or 2 for Ben Hamilton. He and Kupe will be a formidable Guard tandem for years to come. He can also play center.
5th round: 141. Kenny McKinley, WR, South Carolina 6' 189 - Love this pick. This kid put up great numbers w/ Chris Smelley as his QB. He is a polished route runner, creates separation and has great hands and 4.4 speed. He will replace Stokley and be our new slot machine - freeing eddie up to be our #2 (eventually). Great pick.
6th round: 174. Tom Brandstater, QB, Fresno 6'5" 220 - Love it. I told my fellow picklers back in February that I wanted us to get him and we got him. Great size and good arm strength - looks like a young Brady Cassell - type. Good developmental QB. Good Job!!!!
7th round: 225. Blake Schlueter, C, TCU 6'2" 286 - Schluter ran the fastest 40 of any O-lineman (4.6 I think). I like this pick in the 7th. He needs to put on some weight, but he has the makings of a stud – very physical at the point of attack and gets to the second level well.
B. College Free Agents (16 - they already cut 1 - Jack Schweiger)
Braxton Kelley ILB Kentucky
Chris Baker NT - like it
Marquez Branson TE Central Arkansas
Stanley Bryant OT East Carolina
Tony Carter CB Florida State
Britton Colquitt Punter, Tennessee - love it (Dustin Colquitt's little bro)
Marcus Gordon OT Kentucky State
DJ Johnson CB Jackson State
Rulon Davis, OLB Cal - Like it
David Grimes - WR Notre Dame
Dominique Johnson - RB Florida
Everette Pedescleaux - OLB Northern IA - Really like it
Lee Robinson LB Alcorn State
Travis Shelton WR Temple
Lucas Taylor - WR Tennessee
Nate Swift - WR Nebraska
C. 2009 Pro Free Agent Signings (so far)
1. Andre Goodman CB - will start or at least will play a lot situationally depending on how fast A.Smith progresses
2. Brian Dawkins SS - Weapon X will lead our D. He's lost a step, but he'll do what Lynch did for us.
3. Andra Davis ILB - Older, kind of slow but knows the D and is a solid veteran presence at a position of need. Either way, he'll be a huge upgrade over Webster.
4. Correll Buckhalter RB - will help take some of the load off Knowshon, should get a number of looks on 3rd down / in the passing game.
5. Lamont Jordan RB - eh, not sure we need him w/ Hillis in the stable
6. Jabaar Gafney WR - good move, this guy knows our new system / can help the young receivers understand it better.
7. Ronald Fields NT - will likely start at NT. Nolan worked w/ him in SF, so . . . . His rise / fall could largely dictate how good our D is as the NT is KEY in a 3-4 scheme.
8. Chris Simms QB - we'll see. I'm still not sold on the Spleen (maybe I just hate his dad too much).
9. Nick Greisen LB - Koutevides w/out the big contract. Not expecting much here.
10. Brandon Gorin OL - eh
11. Darrell Reid OLB / DT (played DE in 4-3) - We will convert him to rush linebacker. He was considered one of the best special teams players in the league while with Indy.
12. Renaldo Hill FS - Solid guy, ballhawk, should start at FS unless McBath comes out of nowhere with some bubbles.
13. Darius Walker RB - eh, good RB for the Texans, but at this point I'm kind of RB'd out
14. J'Vonne Parker DL - eh
C. Guys we let go:
1. Ebenezer Ekuban, DE. Age: 33 - Peace out Weezy
2. Tatum Bell, RB. Age: 28 - Tatum, Tatum, Tatum - all the best wishes in the world
3. Marquand Manuel, SS. Age: 30. Signed with Lions - the worst SS in history, there's the door
4. Kenny Peterson, DE/DT. Age: 30. Re-signed with Broncos (3 years) A valuable reserve defensive lineman who can play both the 4-3 and 3-4, Kenny Peterson will find a home in Denver's new scheme. - I have my doubts about this Cat, but, we'll see
5. Marlon McCree, S. Age: 32. Signed with Jaguars - Good riddance
6. Nate Webster, ILB. Age: 31. - HA! Worst LB ever allowed in the NFL.
7. Dewayne Robertson, DT. Age: 27 - BUST!
8. J.J. Arrington, RB. Age: 26. J.J. Feel bad for the kid - could've been huge for us in the return game. Good Luck AJ, come see us again when you get the wheel fixed.
9. Selvin Young, RB. Age: 25 - this is what happens when you predict that you'll gain 2000 yards and gain 200.
10. P.J. Pope, RB. Age: 25 - take the pajamas off, the dream is over. If you don't knowshon, you'd better aks somebody.
11. Erik Pears (RFA), OT. Age: 27. - Signed with Raiders - the first O-lineman I've ever hated.
12. Dre Bly, CB. Age: 32. - Signed with 49ers - no comment
13. Anthony Alridge, RB. Age: 25. - Signed with Redskins
14. Karl Paymah, CB. Age: 26. - Signed with Vikings - Hot carl? Eh, not so hot.
15. Michael Pittman, RB. Age: 34. I guess the guns got in his way.
16. Darrell Jackson, WR. Age: 30. Wow, what a disappointment.
17. Jamie Winborn, OLB. Age: 30. Gotta love a guy who does dances after every tackle when you're getting blown out at home by the Raiders - NOT. Good riddance.
18. Glenn Martinez, WR. Age: 27. No comment.
19. Niko Koutouvides, ILB. Age: 28. - Signed with Buccaneers - He can lick on koutouvideeznuts.
20. Nate Jackson, TE. Age: 30. - Good luck w/ the Music career, Jacknasty. Try not to strain a vocal chord.
21. John Engelberger, DE. Age: 32. - good guy - too old and was NEVER starting caliber
22. Chad Mustard, TE. Age: 31. - Announced retirement - RIP CM, now we won't be able to cut you, sign you, cut you, sign you and then cut you again - only to resign you in '10.
23. Patrick Ramsey, QB. Age: 30. - Signed with Titans - brutal, he was the least talented NFL QB I've ever seen
24. Josh Shaw, DT. Age: 29. Not sure why we cut this guy and kept K.Pete (other than McD went to Highschool with K.Pete). Ok, I guess I know why we cut this guy and kept K.Pete.
25. Darrell Hackney, QB. Age: 26. - We'll miss you hack - you should've backed up JC, not Ramsey.
26. Cliff Russell, WR. Age: 30. No comment
27. Jeb Putzier, TE. Age: 30. - Re-signed with Broncos - Class guy, glad we resigned him.
28. Cory Boyd, RB. Age: 24. No Cory, you're not back. You're like cooked crack, but you're not back.
29. Andrew Pinnock, FB. Age: 29 - Eh, whatevs
Analysis:
Boys, our Donkeys made a great many moves this offseason. We kicked it off by being the most active team in free agency. We continued by driving away our pro bowl quarterback. We then traded up 3 times in the draft to take players nobody else seemed too jazzed about, but wound up with what I feel are 10 solid prospects. Overall, I like what we’ve done and I think we are a better team than we were before (except for JC).
Defense: Secondary is much improved, but D-line will tell the tale
On defense, we are moving to a hybrid 3-4 / 4-3 scheme with Mike Nolan at the controls. Our front 7 is our weakness despite the fact that we drafted Ayers at 18 – who I think will be an all-pro (so does Mike Mayock). I believe we wanted to fix our D-line in the draft, but that the talent wasn’t there when we picked.
We did, however, fix our secondary which also needed a facelift. For those of you who forgot, at one point last year we were starting Josh Bell, Dre Bly, Vernon Fox and Marquand Manual - the worst secondary I’ve ever seen in the NFL. We now have Champ, Andre Goodman or Alphonso Smith, Brian Dawkins and Renaldo Hill – HUGE upgrade. Plus we picked up Bruton and McBath for the future – kudos McX.
I believe we will go to work on the front 7 in next year’s draft – which is heralded as being much deeper in D-line talent. For now, the success of our D will rest on the ingenuity of Mike Nolan and the effectiveness of our relatively unknown D-line: Ryan McBean, Ronald Fields, and Kenny Petersen.
Offense: 6 was the future, now 8 is the present
On O, we will look much different, obviously. We will be high-octane but you’d better believe that we will feature Knowshon and the running game. Our O-line is the strength of our team and McDaniels system – the Amoeba – is famous for using the strengths of it’s players. Focusing on the running game should also serve to hide our D-line and allow our D to not be overextended.
While we will feature Knowshon, look for Hillis to get some looks at Tailback / Fullback / and at H-back in the passing game – a la Howard Griffith. McD has alluded to this in recent days. We will run some 3 tight end sets w/ Graham, Sheffler and Quinn and I fully expect Knowshon to be offensive rookie of the year – he will be a monster.
Orton, along w/ our unproven D-line, is the key to our season. And yes, I know there is a QB competition, but there really isn’t. Kyle’s our guy and whether we end up 13-3 or 3-13 will, in large part, depend on his ability to step in, learn the offense and lead us down the field. I think we will run the ball a lot, but Kyle will need to keep defenses honest.
Players to watch:
Kyle Orton and our D-line – they are unknown quantities at key positions on an otherwise stellar team. If both units step-up we will be very good. If neither does, it will be a long, long season.
The development of players like Wesley Woodyard (AKA Mr. Atomic), Spencer Larsen and Peyton Hillis will also be a key. If these guys step-up big, that will definitely allow us to be a deeper and more consistent team.
One guy to watch for is a Free agent rookie named Chris Baker. The guy is 6’2” 330 and is really our only true Nose tackle prospect. He is a stud that had some off the field / maturity issues. On the field, he can dominate. I wouldn’t be surprised if he makes the team and sees time by the middle of the year.
No predictions yet, boys. This inaugural post was merely to inform you of the goings on, w/ more prognostication / editorial flare to follow. So, until next time, keep your reality on the fritz and your Peerality on the blitz.
Peace
A. 2009 Draft:
1st round: 12. Knowshon Moreno, RB, Georgia 5'10" 217 - Best player available, as B.J Raji and T.Jackson (our needs) were gone. This is a good pick-up and you don't draft a RB in the 1st unless he has HOF-type talent. Knowshon is tough, smart, blocks and catches the ball well and is a leader. He's also hilarious and I recomend you check out his Upper Deck and Topps endzone dances. He will truly be a blast for years to come - personality for miles (the horse).
1st round: 18. Robert Ayers, DE, Tennessee 6'3" 272 - High risk. Judging by the senior bowl / Mike Mayock, in Ayers, we drafted the best defensive player in the draft – a steal at 18. If you ask guys like McSheezy, he was a one year wonder at Tennessee (no real production until his senior year) with a checkered past. I like the pick. Look for him to get a look at starting OLB and DE if he puts on some weight. We’ll also look to reduce him inside / play a 5 / 6 technique. He will have his hand on the ground at times and play upright sometimes.
2nd round: 37. Alphonso Smith, CB, Wake Forest 5'9" 195 - Wow. Ok. I love this guy. He set an ACC record w/ 21 interceptions at Wake and is a tough-minded ball-hawk who will see the field immediately as a starting CB or in nickel packages. He is also a stud in the return game. That said, we gave up our #1 pick next year, which could be THE #1 pick or at least a top-five. McD and X said they had him valued “extremely high” and that he was the #1 corner on our board. Whether he was worth it will depend on who was right – the pundits or our front office. If he flourishes / turns into an all-pro, we’ll know McD/Xman are better evaluators than McShay / Kiper.
2nd round: 48. Darcel McBath, FS, Texas Tech 6' 198 - Looks like a solid safety who will play some, contribute hugely to special teams and will likely be a starter w/in a year or two. Also a ball-hawk w/ high character, good speed and good fundamentals.
2nd round: 64. Richard Quinn, TE, North Carolina 6'4" 265 - Another high-character guy. Seems like a Daniel Graham type guy. Great blocker who was underused at North Carolina in the passing game. This move signals a change and shows that we intend do RUN THE BALL - at least more than McD used to, which I like. Again, though, we traded up for him (traded our 2 3rd rounders for a 4th and a 2nd - using the final 2nd on Quinn) so he’d better be truly special.
4th round: 114. David Bruton, FS, Notre Dame 6'2" 219 - Special teams Ace. Could challenge for a starting spot at safety in a year or 2. He was team captain at ND in college - a leader and ANOTHER high-character guy.
4th round: 132. Seth Olsen, G, Iowa 6'5" 306 - Going into the draft I hoped we'd use several picks to fortify our O-line and we did. I love this guy. He is a mauller, big, strong and cornfed. Look for him to start w/in a year or 2 for Ben Hamilton. He and Kupe will be a formidable Guard tandem for years to come. He can also play center.
5th round: 141. Kenny McKinley, WR, South Carolina 6' 189 - Love this pick. This kid put up great numbers w/ Chris Smelley as his QB. He is a polished route runner, creates separation and has great hands and 4.4 speed. He will replace Stokley and be our new slot machine - freeing eddie up to be our #2 (eventually). Great pick.
6th round: 174. Tom Brandstater, QB, Fresno 6'5" 220 - Love it. I told my fellow picklers back in February that I wanted us to get him and we got him. Great size and good arm strength - looks like a young Brady Cassell - type. Good developmental QB. Good Job!!!!
7th round: 225. Blake Schlueter, C, TCU 6'2" 286 - Schluter ran the fastest 40 of any O-lineman (4.6 I think). I like this pick in the 7th. He needs to put on some weight, but he has the makings of a stud – very physical at the point of attack and gets to the second level well.
B. College Free Agents (16 - they already cut 1 - Jack Schweiger)
Braxton Kelley ILB Kentucky
Chris Baker NT - like it
Marquez Branson TE Central Arkansas
Stanley Bryant OT East Carolina
Tony Carter CB Florida State
Britton Colquitt Punter, Tennessee - love it (Dustin Colquitt's little bro)
Marcus Gordon OT Kentucky State
DJ Johnson CB Jackson State
Rulon Davis, OLB Cal - Like it
David Grimes - WR Notre Dame
Dominique Johnson - RB Florida
Everette Pedescleaux - OLB Northern IA - Really like it
Lee Robinson LB Alcorn State
Travis Shelton WR Temple
Lucas Taylor - WR Tennessee
Nate Swift - WR Nebraska
C. 2009 Pro Free Agent Signings (so far)
1. Andre Goodman CB - will start or at least will play a lot situationally depending on how fast A.Smith progresses
2. Brian Dawkins SS - Weapon X will lead our D. He's lost a step, but he'll do what Lynch did for us.
3. Andra Davis ILB - Older, kind of slow but knows the D and is a solid veteran presence at a position of need. Either way, he'll be a huge upgrade over Webster.
4. Correll Buckhalter RB - will help take some of the load off Knowshon, should get a number of looks on 3rd down / in the passing game.
5. Lamont Jordan RB - eh, not sure we need him w/ Hillis in the stable
6. Jabaar Gafney WR - good move, this guy knows our new system / can help the young receivers understand it better.
7. Ronald Fields NT - will likely start at NT. Nolan worked w/ him in SF, so . . . . His rise / fall could largely dictate how good our D is as the NT is KEY in a 3-4 scheme.
8. Chris Simms QB - we'll see. I'm still not sold on the Spleen (maybe I just hate his dad too much).
9. Nick Greisen LB - Koutevides w/out the big contract. Not expecting much here.
10. Brandon Gorin OL - eh
11. Darrell Reid OLB / DT (played DE in 4-3) - We will convert him to rush linebacker. He was considered one of the best special teams players in the league while with Indy.
12. Renaldo Hill FS - Solid guy, ballhawk, should start at FS unless McBath comes out of nowhere with some bubbles.
13. Darius Walker RB - eh, good RB for the Texans, but at this point I'm kind of RB'd out
14. J'Vonne Parker DL - eh
C. Guys we let go:
1. Ebenezer Ekuban, DE. Age: 33 - Peace out Weezy
2. Tatum Bell, RB. Age: 28 - Tatum, Tatum, Tatum - all the best wishes in the world
3. Marquand Manuel, SS. Age: 30. Signed with Lions - the worst SS in history, there's the door
4. Kenny Peterson, DE/DT. Age: 30. Re-signed with Broncos (3 years) A valuable reserve defensive lineman who can play both the 4-3 and 3-4, Kenny Peterson will find a home in Denver's new scheme. - I have my doubts about this Cat, but, we'll see
5. Marlon McCree, S. Age: 32. Signed with Jaguars - Good riddance
6. Nate Webster, ILB. Age: 31. - HA! Worst LB ever allowed in the NFL.
7. Dewayne Robertson, DT. Age: 27 - BUST!
8. J.J. Arrington, RB. Age: 26. J.J. Feel bad for the kid - could've been huge for us in the return game. Good Luck AJ, come see us again when you get the wheel fixed.
9. Selvin Young, RB. Age: 25 - this is what happens when you predict that you'll gain 2000 yards and gain 200.
10. P.J. Pope, RB. Age: 25 - take the pajamas off, the dream is over. If you don't knowshon, you'd better aks somebody.
11. Erik Pears (RFA), OT. Age: 27. - Signed with Raiders - the first O-lineman I've ever hated.
12. Dre Bly, CB. Age: 32. - Signed with 49ers - no comment
13. Anthony Alridge, RB. Age: 25. - Signed with Redskins
14. Karl Paymah, CB. Age: 26. - Signed with Vikings - Hot carl? Eh, not so hot.
15. Michael Pittman, RB. Age: 34. I guess the guns got in his way.
16. Darrell Jackson, WR. Age: 30. Wow, what a disappointment.
17. Jamie Winborn, OLB. Age: 30. Gotta love a guy who does dances after every tackle when you're getting blown out at home by the Raiders - NOT. Good riddance.
18. Glenn Martinez, WR. Age: 27. No comment.
19. Niko Koutouvides, ILB. Age: 28. - Signed with Buccaneers - He can lick on koutouvideeznuts.
20. Nate Jackson, TE. Age: 30. - Good luck w/ the Music career, Jacknasty. Try not to strain a vocal chord.
21. John Engelberger, DE. Age: 32. - good guy - too old and was NEVER starting caliber
22. Chad Mustard, TE. Age: 31. - Announced retirement - RIP CM, now we won't be able to cut you, sign you, cut you, sign you and then cut you again - only to resign you in '10.
23. Patrick Ramsey, QB. Age: 30. - Signed with Titans - brutal, he was the least talented NFL QB I've ever seen
24. Josh Shaw, DT. Age: 29. Not sure why we cut this guy and kept K.Pete (other than McD went to Highschool with K.Pete). Ok, I guess I know why we cut this guy and kept K.Pete.
25. Darrell Hackney, QB. Age: 26. - We'll miss you hack - you should've backed up JC, not Ramsey.
26. Cliff Russell, WR. Age: 30. No comment
27. Jeb Putzier, TE. Age: 30. - Re-signed with Broncos - Class guy, glad we resigned him.
28. Cory Boyd, RB. Age: 24. No Cory, you're not back. You're like cooked crack, but you're not back.
29. Andrew Pinnock, FB. Age: 29 - Eh, whatevs
Analysis:
Boys, our Donkeys made a great many moves this offseason. We kicked it off by being the most active team in free agency. We continued by driving away our pro bowl quarterback. We then traded up 3 times in the draft to take players nobody else seemed too jazzed about, but wound up with what I feel are 10 solid prospects. Overall, I like what we’ve done and I think we are a better team than we were before (except for JC).
Defense: Secondary is much improved, but D-line will tell the tale
On defense, we are moving to a hybrid 3-4 / 4-3 scheme with Mike Nolan at the controls. Our front 7 is our weakness despite the fact that we drafted Ayers at 18 – who I think will be an all-pro (so does Mike Mayock). I believe we wanted to fix our D-line in the draft, but that the talent wasn’t there when we picked.
We did, however, fix our secondary which also needed a facelift. For those of you who forgot, at one point last year we were starting Josh Bell, Dre Bly, Vernon Fox and Marquand Manual - the worst secondary I’ve ever seen in the NFL. We now have Champ, Andre Goodman or Alphonso Smith, Brian Dawkins and Renaldo Hill – HUGE upgrade. Plus we picked up Bruton and McBath for the future – kudos McX.
I believe we will go to work on the front 7 in next year’s draft – which is heralded as being much deeper in D-line talent. For now, the success of our D will rest on the ingenuity of Mike Nolan and the effectiveness of our relatively unknown D-line: Ryan McBean, Ronald Fields, and Kenny Petersen.
Offense: 6 was the future, now 8 is the present
On O, we will look much different, obviously. We will be high-octane but you’d better believe that we will feature Knowshon and the running game. Our O-line is the strength of our team and McDaniels system – the Amoeba – is famous for using the strengths of it’s players. Focusing on the running game should also serve to hide our D-line and allow our D to not be overextended.
While we will feature Knowshon, look for Hillis to get some looks at Tailback / Fullback / and at H-back in the passing game – a la Howard Griffith. McD has alluded to this in recent days. We will run some 3 tight end sets w/ Graham, Sheffler and Quinn and I fully expect Knowshon to be offensive rookie of the year – he will be a monster.
Orton, along w/ our unproven D-line, is the key to our season. And yes, I know there is a QB competition, but there really isn’t. Kyle’s our guy and whether we end up 13-3 or 3-13 will, in large part, depend on his ability to step in, learn the offense and lead us down the field. I think we will run the ball a lot, but Kyle will need to keep defenses honest.
Players to watch:
Kyle Orton and our D-line – they are unknown quantities at key positions on an otherwise stellar team. If both units step-up we will be very good. If neither does, it will be a long, long season.
The development of players like Wesley Woodyard (AKA Mr. Atomic), Spencer Larsen and Peyton Hillis will also be a key. If these guys step-up big, that will definitely allow us to be a deeper and more consistent team.
One guy to watch for is a Free agent rookie named Chris Baker. The guy is 6’2” 330 and is really our only true Nose tackle prospect. He is a stud that had some off the field / maturity issues. On the field, he can dominate. I wouldn’t be surprised if he makes the team and sees time by the middle of the year.
No predictions yet, boys. This inaugural post was merely to inform you of the goings on, w/ more prognostication / editorial flare to follow. So, until next time, keep your reality on the fritz and your Peerality on the blitz.
Peace
Thursday Beer Day
Every Thursday I will provide you with a review of a beer, and sometimes I will review multiple beers or a brewery on a whole.
June 4, 2009 - Hoppy Days - Does this one Jump the Shark?
Breckenridge Brewery, Denver, CO - 471 IPA
If you like IPAs and all that bitter hop flavor that comes with them, then you may want to try this beer. However, if you like IPAs that have a crisp clean finish that don't make you feel like the back of your tongue had a minutia of soap bubbles, then you probably want to pass this IPA up for an Avery IPA (Boulder), a Full Sail IPA, a Bridgeport IPA, or a Long Hammer IPA from Redhook. Its not a bad IPA, but its not a good one either... the flavors seem to balance like a clown car filled with raiders fans on one end and lindsey lohan on the other. Meaning theres too much confusion with the flavor in one aspect and the hoppiness just doesn't seem to settle well with that... maybe a little less hop (or Lindsey Lohan 3 years ago) might just make this a more pallatable beer. Not that it wasn't drinkable, I had three.
The 471 is a small batch and though I don't believe Breckenridge claims it to be an imperial IPA or a double IPA, its 9% alcohol content leads one to believe that it is just that. Again, for much more volume on an "imperial" IPA you should try the one from Avery or Odell. The 471 comes out with a characteristic amber sheen to the body. From first pour it has a foggyness to it that eventually clears up. It has a fairly thick head 1 to 2 fingers tall which lasts most of the beer (depending on whether you drink like me or Mother Theresa - you figure out which one drinks faster, and don't forget she's dead), which is unusual for an IPA.
The firs sniff brings about that floral hoppy citrusy smell and perhaps the hint of juniper or pinyon. You expect to have a clean taste followed by the quick stab of sweet malt followed by the hops mellowing it out on an IPA, here you get the hop bitter first, then a shallow sweet malt flavor that drains down your throat making you feel like you've missed something in the beer... I will bet most of you who know your IPAs will take a quick second sip to see if you were mistaken in the flavor. You weren't. The hop flavor is strong and good, but the follow up just doesn't meet the expected order of such things, nor does it ever have that crisp bite letting you know and understand you just drank a quality beverage.
Too much hop delivered too early, followed by too much malty-sweetness delivered in a muted tone leave you wondering why the beer doesn't finish clean and why you feel like there is some residue still left in your mouth.
Say what you will about Coors, its one of the cleanest finishing beers I've ever had (although not much else there). It is a great stepping stone into the world of beer for someone to understand what I mean. Try the Breck 471 IPA, then follow it with a Coors or Coors light... you will feel that your mouth is cleaner after that first sip of Coors. Good IPAs (like the ones mentioned above) deliver this where the 471 misses.
But its a beer, and not a terrible beer and so it gets 4.5 out of 7 pickles. This is like a B-. If you're ever at the Breck brewery in Denver, the Breck Brepub in Breck, or the Ale House in Grand Junction, ask them what their $2 beer of the day is. Half the time it seems to be the 471, in which case drink up!
June 4, 2009 - Hoppy Days - Does this one Jump the Shark?
Breckenridge Brewery, Denver, CO - 471 IPA
If you like IPAs and all that bitter hop flavor that comes with them, then you may want to try this beer. However, if you like IPAs that have a crisp clean finish that don't make you feel like the back of your tongue had a minutia of soap bubbles, then you probably want to pass this IPA up for an Avery IPA (Boulder), a Full Sail IPA, a Bridgeport IPA, or a Long Hammer IPA from Redhook. Its not a bad IPA, but its not a good one either... the flavors seem to balance like a clown car filled with raiders fans on one end and lindsey lohan on the other. Meaning theres too much confusion with the flavor in one aspect and the hoppiness just doesn't seem to settle well with that... maybe a little less hop (or Lindsey Lohan 3 years ago) might just make this a more pallatable beer. Not that it wasn't drinkable, I had three.
The 471 is a small batch and though I don't believe Breckenridge claims it to be an imperial IPA or a double IPA, its 9% alcohol content leads one to believe that it is just that. Again, for much more volume on an "imperial" IPA you should try the one from Avery or Odell. The 471 comes out with a characteristic amber sheen to the body. From first pour it has a foggyness to it that eventually clears up. It has a fairly thick head 1 to 2 fingers tall which lasts most of the beer (depending on whether you drink like me or Mother Theresa - you figure out which one drinks faster, and don't forget she's dead), which is unusual for an IPA.
The firs sniff brings about that floral hoppy citrusy smell and perhaps the hint of juniper or pinyon. You expect to have a clean taste followed by the quick stab of sweet malt followed by the hops mellowing it out on an IPA, here you get the hop bitter first, then a shallow sweet malt flavor that drains down your throat making you feel like you've missed something in the beer... I will bet most of you who know your IPAs will take a quick second sip to see if you were mistaken in the flavor. You weren't. The hop flavor is strong and good, but the follow up just doesn't meet the expected order of such things, nor does it ever have that crisp bite letting you know and understand you just drank a quality beverage.
Too much hop delivered too early, followed by too much malty-sweetness delivered in a muted tone leave you wondering why the beer doesn't finish clean and why you feel like there is some residue still left in your mouth.
Say what you will about Coors, its one of the cleanest finishing beers I've ever had (although not much else there). It is a great stepping stone into the world of beer for someone to understand what I mean. Try the Breck 471 IPA, then follow it with a Coors or Coors light... you will feel that your mouth is cleaner after that first sip of Coors. Good IPAs (like the ones mentioned above) deliver this where the 471 misses.
But its a beer, and not a terrible beer and so it gets 4.5 out of 7 pickles. This is like a B-. If you're ever at the Breck brewery in Denver, the Breck Brepub in Breck, or the Ale House in Grand Junction, ask them what their $2 beer of the day is. Half the time it seems to be the 471, in which case drink up!
WELCOME HOME MULES!
This is a blog about stuff that is important to the Pickled Mules. Namely - Colorado, Golf, Broncos Football, Colorado Sports, Beer, and sometimes Women.
WHATS IN A NAME - Blog 1
Pickleman
Definition - pickled - pick⋅led /ˈpɪkəld/ Spelled Pronunciation [pik-uhld]
–adjective 1.preserved or steeped in brine or other liquid.
2.Slang. drunk; intoxicated.
3.(of wood) given an antique appearance by applying and partly removing paint or by bleaching.
Origin: 1545–55; pickle 1 + -ed 2
Definition Pickled in the case of this blog = Preserved or steeped in a liquid (in our case beer); also, drunk (though we not yet be drunk good sir and it is in poor form to claim so being). Also things to consider
- Pickles are green, golf courses are green. Coincidence or divinity?
- Pickles are sometimes long, some chicks have long legs. Nice!
- Some pickles are little.... no comment.
- I hate pickles, but I love beer, women, golf, and these mules more than I hate pickles. You see how my flawed logic is so sweet and awesome and ironic.
Definition: Mule - mule1 /myul/ Pronunciation [myool]
–noun 1.the sterile offspring of a female horse and a male donkey, valued as a work animal, having strong muscles, a body shaped like a horse, and donkeylike long ears, small feet, and sure-footedness.
2.any hybrid between the donkey and the horse.
3.Informal. a very stubborn person.
4.Botany. any sterile hybrid.
5.Slang. a person paid to carry or transport contraband, esp. drugs, for a smuggler.
Although we Pickled Mules are not certain we're sterile, we've never yet produced offspring (naturally discounting the claims of that one crazy chick back in '01). We are valued as work animals, although we are primarily lazy. We are stuborn. We are not smuggling drugs, but we are carrying contraband in the matter of nonsense that no one wants to hear or read. BUT, primarily the Mules = Broncos, as in THE DENVER BRONCOS.
We bleed orange and blue and we like to pretend that John Elway is our father and Shannon Sharpe is our mother (what!?!? his name is Shannon). We have the upmost respect and discontempt for this team that we would clay lay our lives down for (FOR FREEDOM!).... right... We love the Broncos, but we think that those who consider the term donkey for them as an insult are idiots. Whats wrong with Donkeys? They don't multiply exponentially (sterile remember) and flood your walmarts ala Raiders fans. They work hard and they are considered smart. Furthermore its like a pet name for something you really love. Sometimes I call my wife (whom I tell I love more than the Broncos) a buttface, but thats because I love her and its cute. And of course, don't forget, that if the true fans take the reigns (pun intended) of the term donkey for the Broncos, then they control the term rather than the term being an insult controlling them.... Plus if you ever watched the Broncos with a passion in the 80s, 90s (excluding 97-99), and most of the 2000s, you've had your heartbroken and you think they've looked like donkeys. I'm sure there are contradictions in here, but I don't care. I DON'T CARE! I Love My DENVER DONKEYS!
WE WILL BE BLOGGING ON ALL COLORADO SPORTS, NOT JUST THE BRONCOS - because, unfortunately they do not play all year round.
So, here we are. June 3, 2009, the Denver Broncos fan club meets the Nuggets, Avs, Rockies, blue yellow, maroon, purple blooded creature, meets the Rocky Mountain Beer Club, meets the International Golfing Association of Colorado.... since none of these exist to my knowledge and they are all important here, we have created the ultimate in ultimates... the most fantastic of fantasticness... drum roll me Peerality!
THE PICKLED MULES
Prepared to be confounded, bewildered.... and probably disappointed. All so, no grammer natzi's I'm an dyslicksick persan.
Boys Welcome Home to a world filled of wonder, bogeys, magic, hops and 6-10 seasons. I bid good ado, adionoche, feliz cumplimentos, hello, and a classic WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUP! to my Bromies (Bros +Homies) in crime and wasting time. Don Antonio - the man at the top; Peerality - the man at the bottom; The Szar - the man that is the meat in a bromie sandwhich; and of course myself, the Pickleman, I provide the miracle whip.... and I have nothing else.... gag.
WHATS IN A NAME - Blog 1
Pickleman
Definition - pickled - pick⋅led /ˈpɪkəld/ Spelled Pronunciation [pik-uhld]
–adjective 1.preserved or steeped in brine or other liquid.
2.Slang. drunk; intoxicated.
3.(of wood) given an antique appearance by applying and partly removing paint or by bleaching.
Origin: 1545–55; pickle 1 + -ed 2
Definition Pickled in the case of this blog = Preserved or steeped in a liquid (in our case beer); also, drunk (though we not yet be drunk good sir and it is in poor form to claim so being). Also things to consider
- Pickles are green, golf courses are green. Coincidence or divinity?
- Pickles are sometimes long, some chicks have long legs. Nice!
- Some pickles are little.... no comment.
- I hate pickles, but I love beer, women, golf, and these mules more than I hate pickles. You see how my flawed logic is so sweet and awesome and ironic.
Definition: Mule - mule1 /myul/ Pronunciation [myool]
–noun 1.the sterile offspring of a female horse and a male donkey, valued as a work animal, having strong muscles, a body shaped like a horse, and donkeylike long ears, small feet, and sure-footedness.
2.any hybrid between the donkey and the horse.
3.Informal. a very stubborn person.
4.Botany. any sterile hybrid.
5.Slang. a person paid to carry or transport contraband, esp. drugs, for a smuggler.
Although we Pickled Mules are not certain we're sterile, we've never yet produced offspring (naturally discounting the claims of that one crazy chick back in '01). We are valued as work animals, although we are primarily lazy. We are stuborn. We are not smuggling drugs, but we are carrying contraband in the matter of nonsense that no one wants to hear or read. BUT, primarily the Mules = Broncos, as in THE DENVER BRONCOS.
We bleed orange and blue and we like to pretend that John Elway is our father and Shannon Sharpe is our mother (what!?!? his name is Shannon). We have the upmost respect and discontempt for this team that we would clay lay our lives down for (FOR FREEDOM!).... right... We love the Broncos, but we think that those who consider the term donkey for them as an insult are idiots. Whats wrong with Donkeys? They don't multiply exponentially (sterile remember) and flood your walmarts ala Raiders fans. They work hard and they are considered smart. Furthermore its like a pet name for something you really love. Sometimes I call my wife (whom I tell I love more than the Broncos) a buttface, but thats because I love her and its cute. And of course, don't forget, that if the true fans take the reigns (pun intended) of the term donkey for the Broncos, then they control the term rather than the term being an insult controlling them.... Plus if you ever watched the Broncos with a passion in the 80s, 90s (excluding 97-99), and most of the 2000s, you've had your heartbroken and you think they've looked like donkeys. I'm sure there are contradictions in here, but I don't care. I DON'T CARE! I Love My DENVER DONKEYS!
WE WILL BE BLOGGING ON ALL COLORADO SPORTS, NOT JUST THE BRONCOS - because, unfortunately they do not play all year round.
So, here we are. June 3, 2009, the Denver Broncos fan club meets the Nuggets, Avs, Rockies, blue yellow, maroon, purple blooded creature, meets the Rocky Mountain Beer Club, meets the International Golfing Association of Colorado.... since none of these exist to my knowledge and they are all important here, we have created the ultimate in ultimates... the most fantastic of fantasticness... drum roll me Peerality!
THE PICKLED MULES
Prepared to be confounded, bewildered.... and probably disappointed. All so, no grammer natzi's I'm an dyslicksick persan.
Boys Welcome Home to a world filled of wonder, bogeys, magic, hops and 6-10 seasons. I bid good ado, adionoche, feliz cumplimentos, hello, and a classic WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUP! to my Bromies (Bros +Homies) in crime and wasting time. Don Antonio - the man at the top; Peerality - the man at the bottom; The Szar - the man that is the meat in a bromie sandwhich; and of course myself, the Pickleman, I provide the miracle whip.... and I have nothing else.... gag.
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